You know those stupid stories on MSN and Yahoo that have titles like “The Top Five Ways to Stick to New Year’s Resolutions” and are written by the latest moron of the week?  More than drugs, alcohol, violence, and tolerance, these stupid articles responsible for the decay of our society.
Check out MSN’s latest masterpiece, “Diet, Exercise Take Off Equal Pounds.”
Tests on overweight people show that a calorie is just a calorie, whether lost by dieting or by running, [U.S. researchers] said.
REALLY?  WHY, THANK YOU, MSN!
“It’s all about the calories,” said Dr. Eric Ravussin …

I was mad that someone won my $254 lottery money until I found out it was this guy.
[Lottery winner James] Wilson asked for a $5 ticket at a store shortly before the drawing, and the clerk mentioned that the shop had some $5 Powerball “Quick Pick” tickets with computer-selected numbers already printed, the statement said.
Wilson agreed and took the next ticket, which turned out to be the single winner.
Funny, because in my days as a gas station clerk, I always thought it’d be funny if those “accident” lottery tickets would ever …

Moscow Mayor Yury Luzhkov said he wouldn’t let any gay pride parades happen in his neck of the woods despite our gay western culture despite pressure from the West. 
He even goes so far as to call gay pride parade “satanic”:
“Last year, Moscow came under unprecedented pressure to sanction the gay parade, which can be described in no other way than as Satanic,” Luzhkov said at the 15th Christmas educational readings in the Kremlin Palace.
That’s taking it a bit far.  Clay Aiken and Lance Bass aren’t “satanic,” unless you’re talking about the …